What I Could Do Differently

The cafeteria lights always seem to hum a little louder than usual. Today, it sounded like a chorus of crickets chirping in my ears. Everyone else seemed to be buzzing with energy, laughing and chatting, while I was picking at my mashed potatoes. Again. 

 

Sabrina was there. Effortlessly cool as always. Her hair was in that perfect messy bun, and she was surrounded by a group of giggling girls. They all seemed so sure of themselves. Like they knew exactly who they were and where they were going. 

 

I felt like a ghost. Invisible. Like I was blending into the background like a bad watercolor painting. 

 

And then, Dave sat down. With his kind eyes and that infectious laugh, he talked about the school play. His face lighting up with enthusiasm. For a moment, I forgot to feel self-conscious. I actually enjoyed talking to him. 

 

Something shifted inside me then. Maybe I could be more like Sabrina. Of course, not by copying her. But by finding my own voice. 

 

I'm going to do something different. I'm going to step outside my comfort zone. 

 

I went to the park where those girls were playing frisbee. My heart was pounding like a drum, and my hands were shaking. But I walked over and just asked to join. 

 

They were surprised at first, but then they smiled and let me play. It was amazing! I wasn't the best, and I tripped over my own feet a few times. But it felt incredible. I was laughing, I was moving, I was... me. 

 

Walking home, I felt lighter somehow. Like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Maybe this isn't about becoming someone else. Maybe it's about finding my own way of being. 

 

I think I might actually try out for that play…

 

I hope I don't chicken out. 


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